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Thursday, May 7, 2009

The Nursing Song

I guess this isn't exactly "blogging" since I'm not technically writing this, but it's too good to pass up! All my breast feeding mommas will appreciate it!


The Nursing Song (for all my fellow breastfeeding mamas!)
(Sing to the tune of Sir Mix a Lot's "Baby Got Back")

I like milk breasts and I cannot lie
you other babies can't deny
that when a mom walks in with an itty bitty waist and
two round things in your face
you get THURSSSSSS-TEE
cuz you notice her bra is stuffed
she's deep in double d's she wearing
im hooked and i can't stop staring
OH MOMMA i wanna get witcha
and drink your juicy pitchers
Enfamil tried to lure me
but only momma's milk makes me WAY healthy!

Ooo boobie's smooth skin
it always makes me grin,
so feed me, feed me,
cause you know it makes me happy
I see 'em bouncin'
With at least six ounces
It's sweet.
This treat!
Sit down mom, pull up a seat!
I'm tired of magazines,
sayin' formula is the thing
Ask the average baby and they'll say, "Snap!
Give it to me straight from the tap!"

So, Mommas (yeah!)
Mommas (yeah!)
can you NIP without any drama?
(HELL YEAH!)
Then nurse 'em, nurse 'em, nurse 'em, nurse 'em,
nurse your precious babes

Momma's got milk!
(Mom's sweet face over big full boobies)
Momma's got milk!
(Mom's sweet face over big full boobies)

I like 'em round and big
I'm like a little baby pig
I just can't help my self,
I'm eatin' like an animal
Bottles can't hold a candle
I wanna get that booju and slurp,
slurp it up slurp slurp
I ain't talking 'bout Playtex
Cause silicone nips are made for chumps
I like 'em real big and juicy
so give me your big bubbles
boobies don't give me trouble
rarely do I get a gas bubble
I'm lookin' at TLC's baby shows
Oh would you look at that...Oh, NO!
You can keep that mooju.
I'll keep on stickin' with booju.
A word to all you new mommas.
It's no trauma
It's not a big drama
I gotta be straight,
your baby can nurse
til the break of dawn
Now you've got it goin' on
Similac won't like this song
Cause they count on you to try it and quit it,
but you know those breasts make milk
It's not wrong. You're strong
Let's get that lactating on

So babies (squee!)
babies (squee!)
Do you wanna have your thirst sated?
Momma undo your bra, whip it out,
you make this baby shout

Momma's got milk!
(Mom's sweet face over big full boobies)
Momma's got milk!
(Mom's sweet face over big full boobies)

Yeah mommas.
When it comes to breastfeeding?
Size ain't got nothin' to do with your ability.
Bs? Cs? Double Ds?
You've got all your baby needs.

So they gave you a "success bag"
complete with a Nestle tag
But don't think that you always need
to get some free swag
Leave that sample up on the shelf
you can make it yourself
You can have some wine and sushi,
Your babe can have your milk!
Some docs wanna play that hard role
and tell you to supplement.
Momma toss it! Leave it!
The trashman can retrieve it!
So the security guard says, "Stop that!"
Well, I ain't down with that.
Cause my boobs are full
and this baby needs feeding,
It's his needs that I'll be meetin'
Some knuckleheads tried to be snide,
but the law is on my side.
I'm not feeding her in the restroom.
So stop with your doom and gloom.

So momma if your babe needs food
Go ahead and do what's good.
Sit down and feed that baby there
and let your milkies flow
Momma's got milk!

2 comments:

  1. OMG that was so funny to read. I am glad you started a blog. Makes me happy!lol.

    ReplyDelete
  2. That song was a great way to start my day, thanks!

    ReplyDelete