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Saturday, September 26, 2009

Little Miss Independant...

"The mother-child relationship is paradoxical and, in a sense, tragic.  It requires the most intense love on the mother's side, yet this very love must help the child grow away from the mother, and become fully independent."-Erich Fromme, German-American Philosopher.


My baby girl is growing up.  It seems that by giving her room to crawl an inch, I gave her room to crawl a mile.

We walk into a hectic room-a party-and she clings to me, but only for a moment.  She wants down.  Why am I carrying her? She asks.  So I put her down.  She crawls away...just a few short feet, and turns to make sure I'm still there.  She plays ball with me as she eases into the rhythm of the party.  She looks around.

Then, reassured, she takes off.  She is my social butterfly-where did this come from?

She crawls up to other adults with her flirty smile and hands them a ball.  She needs someone to toss it to her.  After a moment or so, she moves on to the next adult.  She makes her way around the room, talking, playing, watching.

She never looks back.  She goes into the other room where the big kids are playing, and she dives right in She plays with trucks, and blocks, and a rocking horse.  She follows the other kids around.  She reads a few books. She has a great time.

Who needs mom? These toys are cool!

My little baby is not a little baby anymore.  She is a kid.  And to kids, toys win.


I am proud of her, but my feelings are conflicted with nostalgia.  I went into that party expecting her to cling to me until the end.  Expecting her to want no one but me.  Expecting her to want comfort.  Instead, she didn't need me.  She needed her independence.  She needed to explore.  She needed to know she didn't need me.

It seems I have raised her well.  She is thriving and ready to branch out.  I just can't help but wonder, how much longer will she be my baby??


1 comment:

  1. She is getting big! It was fun to see her explore, and I know exactly how you feel. I remember that feeling all to well. This won't be the last time you feel it either. Funny thing was I watched her explore at the party and thought "Wow, this is not our little Addie." She was the first born into our little group and she's getting so big, I for one thank you for letting me watch her grow!~Mindy