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Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Good Morning?? Ha. Yeah Right.

I know by the time I finish this post, it will no longer be morning, but this is the first time I've had a chance to sit down and focus all day!!  I apologize in advance about the utter disaster that is this post and the grammar contained in it. I still haven't even finished my coffee.

It started out like any other day.  Actually, it started better than most days, since I rolled over lazily to see the clock say 7.45 a.m.  I laid there for a minute listening for the sounds I must have missed in such a deep sleep.  Surely, my daughter is already awake and playing quietly in her crib.  Or not.  Apparently my sweet little offspring decided to give mommy a gift today and sleep in!!  I forgot what that felt like.

We had a leisurely hour of play time while she finished drinking her "milk" and I got a chance to check my email.  It was appearing to be a pretty fantastic day.  Then breakfast happened.

You wouldn't think cereal and fruit could cause a child to need a full-on bath  to get cleaned up after breakfast, but sure enough, she found a way to accomplish that.  No biggie.  She kind of had a "I peed through my diaper sometime in the middle of the night" stench to her anyway, so we'll take a bath and wash the sheets.  I got her nice and cleaned up pretty quickly so since she was having so much fun I let her play with her bath toys for a few minutes.  Oh no.  I see bubbles...

Yep.  She did it.  She pooped in the tub.  Not only did she do that, but she wanted to continue playing in said tub, and threw a royal fit when I took her out.  I had to take her out of the bathroom to make sure she wouldn't try to climb back in, completely disregarding the soiled tub for the moment.  Get her cleaned up and dressed again and put her in the living room with her toys.  I look down the hall to see the make-shift curtain we put up over the play room fluttering*.  Again, no good.  Fluttering curtains means one of them figured out how to get past it-thumb tacks and all. (I know..I'm super classy.  If you saw it you'd think it was even classier).  I run down the hall in time to see a cat dart out from under the sheet.  Crap!!  I can't deal with this right now!!  Turn around to go back down the hall and realize I don't see Addie anywhere.  But I hear water splashing.  Yep, she was trying to play in the water I forgot to drain from the tub!!! I go in there, drain the tub, pull her out of the bathroom and get her hands cleaned up.  I put her back in the living room and start trying to clean the tub out-which now has poop caked onto it, and I look over and the cat is darting back into the play room she can't go into!!!  I dart over there in time to scare her and she runs away from the curtain, then proceed to head back to the bathroom and take care of the tub situation, where Addie chooses to join me again and try to climb.  Again, I take her out of the bathroom and turn on cartoons for her, hoping that Yo Gabba Gabba is enough to distract her from the enticing bath tub.  Look down the hall...the curtain is ripped down from the doorway and there is a cat squatting in the area we are trying to get the stink out of!!  Addie is running down the hall at me, she just can't wait to get back into her play room that keeps getting taken away.

Meanwhile, Willie is asleep after working the night shift in the room right next door as I completely lose it and toss my cat out of the play room, scoop Addie up, and go yell at him that I-need-some-help-I've-got-cats-and-kids-going-in-every-direction-poop-in-the-bathtub-stinky-pee-sheets-cranky-11-month-old-ripped-curtains-and-cold-coffee!!!!!!

Thankfully, Willie got up and cleaned the bathroom while I cleaned up the mess in the play room and figured out a way to fix the curtains.  Now they actually seem to be hanging better, with no loose areas that can be squeezed through.  So, with Willie's help, we have a clean bathroom, a napping toddler, dry play room, curtains hung, and sheets washing.  Thanks to me we both have warm coffee and a few minutes of peace and quiet.

If it sounds like absolute mayhem, that's because it was.  I don't see how moms with more than one kid have enough arms.  Today really is one of those days that teach you about Surviving Motherhood.


*For those of you that don't know, we had to barricade the play room while we wait for this odor neutralizer to do it's job, thanks to a certain bladder issue from one of our cats.

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