You're Lucky, You Know..

What is with this phrase? I must say, nothing irks me more than being told I'm "so lucky."

You're so lucky you've lost so much weight after the baby....I guess you haven't seen my food journal or my daily weigh ins that I did for months.

You're so lucky you got out of that little hometown of yours and have you're own life...You could do it, too, if you wanted to badly enough.

You're so lucky you're able to stay home with Addie every day....Read my response to that last comment.  Same applies.

You know what? I'm not lucky.  Willie and I work really, really hard for what we have.  We make a lot of sacrifices for me to be able to stay at home with Addie.  It's what we wanted and it's what's important to us.  It's not something that just fell into our laps.  It's not an opportunity that was given to me for no reason.  It's what I've wanted forever.  I never knew what I wanted to do with my life other than be a mom and be with my kids, so that's what I'm doing.  Willie works harder because of it.  We do without a lot of things...like a second car, our own home, dinners out, dates, babysitters, and so many little things. Addie practically lives in hand-me-downs.  She doesn't have a ton of toys(although she has a great imagination and love for the outdoors).

We're not lucky that we moved across country, either.  Again, it's something we wanted, and worked hard for.  We sacrificed a lot to be able to do it.  We're still sacrificing. Willie is back in school because he couldn't find a job in his field when we moved here.

Lucky is being given a house, like both my sister and cousin have experienced.  Lucky is being given cars left and right, or being given money to live on every day.  We're not lucky. We're just hard workers.

Many of our decisions were followed by overwhelming fear that almost made us turn back, but we did it.  I quit my job and we  live off of Willie's income (at least until my business takes off and I can help supplement) and it's hard most days.  We weigh each purchase like it were a major purchase.  Even better (and scarier, and harder), we do it completely alone.  We don't have our families to lean on for support.  Grandma isn't coming over to babysit for free so I can get housework done or go grocery shopping in peace.  I can't remember our last date night.

Don't get me wrong, all of it is worth it.  I love my life.  I get stressed just like anyone else, but I still love it.  I don't regret a single decision we've made in the last four years- okay, maybe I regret the decision last night to not go buy ice cream.  If I were to do it all over again, I'd probably make the same decisions.  My point, though, is to please quit telling me I'm "lucky." Luck didn't have anything to do with where we are now.  Recognize our hard work for what it is.  Hard.  Know that we stress out about money and what the future holds just as much as everyone else, but we do it because we've already weighed the pros and cons and know we can get through it.

I'm not lucky.  I'm just determined, and very, very stubborn.